finally, a chance to relax..

Freedom How does each person define freedom? Is it freedom to do whatever they want? To have all the time in the world? To relax? I guess, my definition of freedom lies somewhere between wanting to do whatever I want, (but in a restrained sort of manner) and just lazing around. That's what books are to me. A gateway to another world. It feels like time stands still as I examine each character crafted with the help of the current author...I am so engrossed I feel as if I'm there. Examining each character's features, their flaws, their strengths. The book I just finished reading is My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult. An incredibly well written book, genuinely amazing and deals with a rather interesting ethics issue. Fiction it is, but the issues are real. It's a story about Anna who has been essentially created as a bone marrow match for her sister Kate who has leukemia. Each 'chapter' is told from the perspective of one of the characters which makes it a captivating read...

Encouragements

Below are some encouraging verses and a brief excerpt that I've found deeply encouraging. The excerpt from Henri Nouwen, truly gives perspective to the feelings that we often have during mourning.

Isaiah 54:10
Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the LORD, who has compassion on you..

Romans 15:13
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Where Mourning and Dancing Touch Each Other
by Henri Nouwen

"[There is] a time for mourning, a time for dancing" (Ecclesiastes 3:4). But mourning and dancing are never fully separated. Their "times" do not necessarily follow each other. In fact, their "times" may become one "time." Mourning may turn into dancing and dancing into mourning without showing a clear point where one ends and the other starts.

Often our grief allows us to choreograph our dance while our dance creates the space for our grief. We lose a beloved friend, and in the midst of our tears we discover an unknown joy. We celebrate a success, and in the midst of the party we feel deep sadness. Mourning and dancing, grief and laughter, sadness and gladness - they belong together as the sad-faced clown and the happy-faced clown, who make us both cry and laugh. Let's trust that the beauty of our lives becomes visible where mourning and dancing touch each other.

family

I love being at home with family. Listening to my brother go on and on about different issues, my mom telling me to eat more fish, and my dad making little comments here and there. *sigh* although the reason why I was home this past weekend wasn't expected it was good to be there for my family & support my dad, and grandfather.. as they go through this difficult time. We all know how sad it is when a loved one passes away, but somehow for me the reality doesn't always hit until my grandfather started breaking down and crying - all expected of course, but I just couldn't help but cry along. It's been tough, since my grandmother was someone I was close to. She took care of me when I was young, brought me to the preschool, cooked lunch for me, brought me to eat dimsum, and was always there for me throughout my childhood years. I still have my childhood quilt where she sewed my name (just in case I lost it).

Although, I've caught myself being sad lately missing my grandmother, I have so many good memories of her. Her selflessness was in everything she did, and that is something I will remember.